Shoulder imp: Dooo iiiit. If it works, you can kiss him as much as you want!
Shoulder faerie: No! This would be cheating. It’s not ethical!
Imp: It’s only a little bit of cheating. The tiniest bending of the rules. It barely even counts.
Faerie: But once you find out if there’s a way to do it at all, the temptation to use this power for evil would be too great! Besides, Thorn loves your loyalty and your honesty!
Imp: Thorn would also love his mouth and his —
Faerie: We know!