I was going to do “quick update on the fallout with Kale” as a regular daily storyline…but after the current Epidemic Flashback, we’re getting a more action-heavy storyline, and then the next run of Epidemic Flashback, and you probably would’ve had no Kale between September and February.
So I figured it was better to roll it up into bigger units and release them on Sundays. (Although you might still be able to reverse-engineer some of the every-4th-panel punchlines.)
Therapist: Congratulations, Kale — you’re my first official telemedicine patient! I know it’s unusual, but once we get started, I think . . .
Kale: Actually, doc . . . can we just . . . start next week?
I get that there’s a lot of new stuff I need therapy for —
Almost getting murdered, by a pro assassin with a great motive who’s still at large, having to self-isolate and stay completely locked-down at home until they’re caught, transforming (well, halfway) and feeling my powers for the first time in years, having my ID leaked to a stranger that I never would’ve shared it with on purpose, the whole everything with Thorn . . .
And I’ll talk about it eventually, but now — I’m so tired.
Can you just mark me down as all therapized for one session, officially Low Risk Of Murder Spree for one more week, and clock out early, and let me go to sleep?
Therapist: . . .
Let’s make a deal.
You can sign out early, and I’ll report that you’re still in good-faith compliance with your treatment . . . As long as you promise not to hurt yourself . . .
Kale: Yeah. Sure. Wasn’t planning to do Dex’s job for them.
Therapist: . . . and to eat. Three meals a day, at least until our next session.
Kale: Uh. Doc, my appetite is less than zero.
Therapist: Your body needs the nutrition, whether you’re hungry or not.
Kale: I can manage one meal per day.
Therapist: I won’t accept lower than two.
Kale: Only if meal-replacement drinks count.
Therapist: If you do at least one solid meal, you can have a drink for the other.
Kale: Ughhhhh. Deal.