Juniper: The law: Vampires can only drink the blood of Sønheic citizens if:
(1) they get critically injured while hiking in the wilderness
Vampire: Ooh, I love a frozen smoothie.
Juniper: (2) they volunteer (and are 21 or over)
Not!Bella: Take me now!
Vampire: Can I see some ID? You don’t look old enough to drink.
Juniper: (3) they attack first
Vampire: That was my BFF you just staked.
Juniper: (3b) If you’re a foreigner, but you attack first on their soil, you’re also fair game.
Not!Buffy: I’m allowed! We’re in Månborg!
Vampire: Sønheim annexed you last month. Don’t you read the news?
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14 Comments
“We annexed you!” Dang. that’s all sorts of harsh XD Is this a common thing for Sonheim does? is it a resent change? Can I make reference to the USSR and it’s satellite states in order to ask for a comparison without offending people?
*”Is this a common thing that Sonheim does? is it a recent change?” *head desks and reminds self to proofread better*
This comment hits differently in the light of Ukrane.
You say that like Russia’s invasion of Ukraine marks a difference in their behavior, and isn’t just the latest round of the exact same imperialism they’ve pursued for the past 50+ years.
You mean since 1612?
It’s true that back then, it was considered normal behavior. But other countries changed, Russia didn’t.
This is a weirdly combative comment, given that it sounds like we don’t actually disagree on anything.
And, who the heck monitors and enforces these “laws”? Like, making sure the “critically wounded” hiker was wounded BEFORE being found, and without any help (getting chased over a ravine, for example) by the thirsty vamp? I wonder if the people who passed these “laws” really felt that they had any choice?
Game Warden: Sir, were you aware that your hiker tags only limit you to three injured travellers per season?
Vamp: Last year it was five!
Game Warden: No excuse sir.
“It’s unpleasantly like being drunk.”
“What’s so unpleasant about being drunk?”
“Just ask a glass of water.”
*snort* Gives a WHOLE new meaning to hostile takeover.
Why is it that it the vampire designs are similar to Alucard from Hellsing?
Google “And Shine Heaven Now”.
Same reason the vampire-flirter is similar to Bella and the vampire slayer is similar to Buffy: references are fun. And on a more technical note, it speeds up reader comprehension — since these are one-off background characters, who don’t get a lot of panels or dialogue to establish them, making them look like other pop-culture figures is a handy shortcut to clue you in about what their deal is.
Besides, there are only so many distinguishing details you can cram into a red-eyed, pointy-toothed, generally-masculine silhouette =)
Awesome and I also don’t know of any other vampires that have quite the same effect as Alucard
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